Sunday, May 3, 2009

HUMANITY IS A-TORSO.

Don't let the math do you.


You cannot call a dead bee a bee. You may call a dead bee a "was" because it certainly doesn't be anything, anymore, aside from a chitinous skeptic. Similarly, a deposed strongman may have a roof over his head but no Despot to piss in, or does that refer to the triumphant Putsch-man, instead? Coups come in all forms, though in one sense, the song of the dove is, therefore, a contradiction. "Coup Coup," sayeth the dove, who otherwise queued for peace. If it were not queue, but skew, then professional standers-in-wait would be Skewers, whether they stilted the curve, or not. Sewers are a sore spot for so-so sowers, go-go goers who gore the gawkers. In the Gawkery. Patron asked Server in Foreign Restaurant for Curry Favor but Server informed Patron that Curry Favor was now Felony. "In these times" or Thereabouts. Which is shorthand for Fisticuffs all around. Which is shorthand for Clenched in Shirtsleeves, light on the Starch Your Own Habits Tat. That which waffled in an apiary could be termed a Bee That As It May, its flanks a Bee Hind, its hive a hairdo, its humanity a-torso, Coup Coup Ka Chew. Putsch your Funny where your Mouth is, Putsch me and I'll Putsch you back, Jack!

19 comments:

mark wallace said...

Sundays are not good days for coups. Everyone's at home, eating skewers. But Monday: Let it Coup Down.

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

If a putsch fails, you can't let the leader free, less he try to recoup his losses. ----------------------------------------------------------------BA

mark wallace said...

Monday. Now I'm ready to make the big putsch and count coup on my enemies.

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

Damn you, man. I know you're eating that Maria's Pollo. I know you are. Never go to coup without yr 1/2 chicken + 2 sides. -----------------------------------------------------BA

mark wallace said...

Been a little cloudy and chilly for Maria's. Soon though. Did a recent putsch at the Pizza Port bottle shop though. It was very very coup.

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

The liner notes for DIZ AND GETZ go something like, "Dizzy wanted a piece of someone, that day, badly, and he tried to cut Stan Getz" (I'm a bit buzzed over here) but later, Getz done and couped him down. Dig? Dizzy came at him with fire and Getz played that coup jazz. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------BA

mark wallace said...

It's like the story of the two piano players: one comes in and plays huge sheets of notes, trying to putsch everyone around. Then the second player comes out and plays just one note and coups him just like that.

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

Yeah, man. He couped that cat with one putsch. -------------------------------------------BA

Anonymous said...

Hello. I have nothing new to dsay. I'm goiing to eat the chicken popper wrap later in school. That should be nutritious! DAVE thinks your blog is "opaque". I gave him a look, then I gave my mom a look. You know what I'm saying? "Cheers", Gina

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

Gina, that's very funny. But maybe you shouldn't beat up too much on DAVE. Is the chicken popper wrap school cafeteria grub? Now THAT is opaque. -----------------------------------------------------------------------BA

Anonymous said...

The chicken pooper wrap, I mean. yes, they serve that in the cafe. We are also entitled to "sides". Gina

mark wallace said...

The chicken popper is so opaque, it probably needs its own whole blog post. Even then, though, I bet we'd have no clue what's in it. The people that make those things cover their tracks. And note here that I'm not even attempting to imagine that I'll ever find out what's in the "sides." Talk about uncoup.

Anonymous said...

That chicken pooper wraps is gross, to borrow a term. Now that all the av aides sit in the cafeteria gotether we're a mafia. Everyone's up in arms. I hate school? Yes, I hate school. I'd like to joint the merchant marine. They now have opaque boats. Gina

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

Gina, the words you create with typos -- "gotether", for ex. -- continue to amaze.

As for you, Mark Wallace, well, there are some people out there -- present company excepted -- who have no coup whatsoever that a putsch is a tie, no matter how you see it, a draw, a putsch, a tie, a shovel hitting the top of the casket, eh?

-------------BA

mark wallace said...

Coupless in America all right. But I'm afraid that group includes me.

Only problem with the Opaque Merchant Marine: they probably serve Opaque Chicken Poppers seven days a week. That's both gross and uncoup.

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

The Chicken Popper Wraps is gross when it comes to couplinary delights or high coupsine. Chicken popper wraps? That sounds like a Reagan program. ------BA

mark wallace said...

Didn't Reagan think Chicken Popper Wraps was a vegetable? Talk about the big putsch.

Still, what has Gina and her team of Distgruntled AV Aides done to us? I've been saying Chicken Popper Wraps for days. So uncoup.

Anonymous said...

Iv'e waited days to respond to this because I'm in conniptions over the intentional misspelling. "Distgruntled". I am listening to Kraftwerk. do you like kraftwerk? Who is this Mark Wallace. I looked him up on the web and found "an adult movies jveteran" and a poetry writer. Which i9s it? gina

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

Well, Gina, the adult movies veteran is Jewish, and that's also a stage name, I imagine, with a variety of different spellings, so the Wallace we have here is the poetry Wallace, and a great one at that. We're all enamored with your kinniption fits and misspellings, and yes, I think we all own a Kraftwerk CD or two. I have Trans Europe Express, but I'd like to get a copy of that other one from the same time. Autobahn, I think. What's for lunch this week? --------------BA