The football version of ‘Cowboys and Indians’
(1)
On a recent car ride, my brother and I tried to engage in
conversation by calling each other “kike”, you know, to possess a word which is
not, in all likelihood, being spoken by anyone anywhere. “Yo,” I may have said,
“you’re a low-down, shiftless, ‘skonky’ kike!” It didn’t even work. He got amused
by the word ‘shiftless’ and we entered into secondary hysterics. Some slurs, I
imagine, will always enrage the object of a name-calling session while other names,
to be insulting, depend upon the context. I doubt that a stranger, in any
event, could utter the word ‘redskin’ to a Native American without causing
offense. Would a white man (a white-skin) walk over to a person of color and
greet him as ‘brown-skin’? There are many African Americans who play football for
the Washington Redskins. I can’t imagine that any of them would tolerate the
word ‘black-skin’ if spoken to them or emblazoned, for example, on a game-day
program.
(2)
The Washington Bullets basketball team changed its name in
1997, in large part to disconnect itself from the soaring murder rate in the
city proper. That’s to be applauded, except that the replacement name, the
Washington Wizards, is terrible. It’s not intimidating; it shortens to The Wiz (or
The Whiz); and it offers forgettable options for logos, mascots, branding, et
cetera. Nobody would suggest that the Redskins franchise should change its name
haphazardly, but at the same time, numerous options present themselves. The
Bullets might have transformed themselves into the Sea Dogs, a name reputedly
mentioned as a finalist for the switch. Who were these Sea Dogs but English
pirates who operated in the Caribbean, and by naming a team the Sea Dogs, I doubt
that any pirates, seas, or dogs would take offense. It shortens to “dogs” (“Who
let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who?”) and fits with other franchise names that
refer to marauders.
(3)
That said, let’s take a quick look at the 32 current
franchise names in the National Football League, broken into four categories:
Animals with Local, National, or General Significance
Arizona Cardinals
Atlanta Falcons
Baltimore Ravens
Carolina Panthers
Chicago Bears
Cincinnati Bengals
Denver Broncos
Detroit Lions
Indianapolis Colts
Jacksonville Jaguars
Miami Dolphins
Philadelphia Eagles
Seattle Seahawks
St. Louis Rams
Lions and Bears mauling each other but not slurring a group of people
Figures from American History, Industry, and Lore
Buffalo Bills
Cleveland Browns
Dallas Cowboys
Green Bay Packers
Houston Texans
New England Patriots
New Orleans Saints
New York Jets
Pittsburgh Steelers
San Diego Chargers
San Francisco 49ers
Mythological Beings and Marauders from World History
Minnesota Vikings
New York Giants
Oakland Raiders
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Tennessee Titans
Native American Imagery
Kansas City Chiefs
Washington Redskins
I cannot vouch for the wholesomeness of every team name
listed here (bears have surely mauled and eaten lots of people, probably even
some Native Americans) but on the surface, 30 of these 32 names do not slur an
entire group, and the 31st name, the Chiefs, at least
conjures leadership as opposed to skin color. It, too, has been the subject of
protest from Native American groups. On some level, it defies understanding why
the Kansas City and Washington franchises cling to their names, given the many
other kinds of names employed (and branded) successfully by other franchises.
(4)
In its (bumbling) defense the Washington Redskins leadership
cries about the “horrors of rebranding” and the “loss of tradition.” Let me
pause to laugh a little bit. In the tenure of the current owner, Daniel Snyder,
the team has changed coaches and quarterbacks so often, without much in the way
of results, that there is, at present, very little tradition of winning, and
frankly, rebranding could be just the thing to generate excitement in the club.
At any rate, Snyder earned a lot of his money through direct advertising—so the
apparent horrors of rebranding escape me. We’re not talking billions, at any
rate. Snyder only has a few of those. No, we’re talking millions, which Snyder
has lots of, lots and lots of millions does Mr. Daniel Snyder have, yes.
(5)
Simply put: if Daniel Snyder, owner, cannot walk up to a
Native American and say, “Hey, how’s it going, redskin?” then the team name
Washington Redskins cannot and should not be on TV every week.
