Tuesday, November 1, 2016

SONNET (FOR POKÉMON GO)



In the still of the night was the same moonshine as in the still of the day. You keep phoning in sick because you’ve got a weekend immune system. The strongman of Samsung and Goliath slays several Philistines with the jawbone of an ass, before his smartphone catches fire. A detective once explained that he would place suspects into two categories: Alibi Yes and Alibi No. Given his one phone call, the Jamaican tried to explain his predicament—“I’m in de pokey, mon!”—but his friends thought he was relishing his commitment to the anime game, Pokémon Go. Eventually he was freed, since the jury couldn’t reach a verdict. (They were dread-locked.)

When Jack Kerouac wasn’t himself, you could say that he was “beat off.” Literary scholars have unearthed two more J.D. Salinger works, and will now combine them in an expanded collection, Franny, Granny, Tranny, and Zooey. There’s a hell of a medium-cooked pasta and its name is al Dente’s Inferno. Lawyers love the morality tale, “The Torts and the Heir”, but often misinterpret Fort Reform: instead of holding down the fort they advocate for cutting a fort, instead. Surely the wife of a famous psychotherapist stepped into her undergarment, her Freudian slip. Definitions: (1) She peered like a great cat, so the media lionized her (2) The Scottish and their Lyin’ Ayes!


this post is part of a double issue. also see SONNET (FOR ECHOLOCATION)

4 comments:

mark wallace said...

Like people need to play a phone game to see weird little creatures crawling everywhere. This piece shows exactly why they don't. Just look around, you know? Look around.

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

right? like the creature what came out the dumpster. now THAT thing was NOT on my phone! and i could not capture it by flinging a poke ball at its head. the things it said to me! whoo!

or, i mean, ride the train with me, some time. it's good they have those emergency budweisers (or should i say "america") strategically located every so often. how i need them whoo!

ba

mark wallace said...

I think the time has come for Emergency Imperial Stout on many trains in the US.

DAN / DANIEL GUTSTEIN said...

What you're saying is -- that commuter rail and rail and alternative rail must (1) acknowledge the Emergency, which has existed for decades and (2) having acknowledged the Emergency, establish stores of Product (*) to assist travelers in their time of need.

By (*) Product, Oh Yes, we mean Imperial Stout. A fine suggestion. A Stout on Every Train!

--------------------b.a.